Jilliane's 1st X'mas (thru her eyes)

It started out on a cold, wet X'mas Eve.

Mummy bundled me up in a pink poncho and off we went to church to wish Jesus happy birthday.

Mummy says Jesus on this day, many many years ago was like me, a little baby.. but he was born in a manger, whilst I had a comfortable time in the hospital nursery.


Daddy, Mummy, Ah Gong & Ah Ma had a feast, including a delicious looking log cake. I was forced to take a picture with the log cake. I just do not understand why I had to take a photo with food I can't even taste!


X'mas day itself was exciting! I had many presents, mainly clothes & toys.


In the afternoon when the sky started to clear, we headed down to Centrepoint as Mummy wanted to head for the Robinson's sale. I guess it's more toys & clothes for me! But alas, the crowd was horrendous and Mummy gave up. We ended up with coffee at New York New York.

That's my story for my 1st Christmas..

1 year ago

It's been a year since I was in Hokkaido, totally free spirited with no worries about time & money. We just did what we wanted, went wherever we felt like going but 365 days later, all these have changed.

I didn't know then that JD was already "baking" inside me. This term "baking" was coined by JD's daddy. I was drinking beer, snow skiing, jumping up & down in the snow & going to onsens almost daily. All these are strict no-nos when one's pregnant and I'm so grateful that my baby is out big & strong.

I can still remember wondering to myself why Hokkaido was not as cold as everybody claimed it was. It's hard to fathom how could I be shivering in Jeju but not in Hokkaido which is so much colder. I couldn't understand why I was dead beat by 7pm every night. As unlikely as it may sound, I attributed it initially to the long days and.. age. I had packed tons of pads to Japan, expecting my period but it never came. Again, I brushed it off, afterall I never had regular periods and being away in a cold, foreign land is a high possibility for the delay.

When I touched down in Singapore on New Year's eve, I tested, just for fun. It was negative. The next day, still no sign of blood. Hmm, I tested again. Negative. Well ok, I guess my period's super delayed. On 2nd January, I woke up early for work. Didn't know what to do so just took out another kit to test. 2 lines appeared this time round! I was shocked and excited. I called DW into the bathroom to see, just to ensure that my eyes weren't playing tricks on me. When he saw, he just looked at me blankly and asked, er.. so,what does that mean.. I went HUH.. you are the one who's been moaning to me for the past year that u want to be a father and now you are asking me what the 2 lines represent? Bish bish. MEN! Made a quick phone call to Gin who told me to visit Doc Fong straight away. I did and the rest is history.

Well, it's 1 year later and here I am now, blessed with a beautiful baby girl. Sure, it's hard work balancing a career, being a daughter, a wife and a mom but what I have in return is a wonderful family whom I can experience the X'mas warmth & festive cheer with.

Merry Christmas everyone & hope that 2009 will bring about good tidings for all for us!

An old friend

I found an old friend, a friend whom I got to know 11 years ago whilst working at a retail shop, on facebook recently. He was someone dear to me but somehow we lost contact along the way, especially when I was busy in the midst of my wedding preparations.

Through facebook, I discovered that he was recently married, posted to France and having a seemingly good time there. He drives an SLK and his wife is a tai tai. Not from a well-to-do family and certainly not one who was good academically, he was one of the most unlikely persons to have reached this status and I'm damn proud of him that he has finally achieved it. I'm sure his mom in heaven is equally pleased with her son's success. The irony is that just a decade ago he was saving hard to join our mutual friend (his girlfriend then) in France when she went over for a study stint but didn't eventually as they separated just before. Yet now, he is there with a big fat pocket and with his wife who was actually his ex girlfriend whom he had broken up with, to be with our mutual friend. Er, not too complicated to decipher I hope!

I'm sure our mutual friend who is happily married now to someone else, does not regret not continuing her relationship with this guy but she does wonder what will her life be like now if she had gotten married to him instead. Will she be enjoying the tai tai lifestyle, driving the SLK along the beaches in Nice and attending the closed door LV sales in Bordeaux?

Fate does funny things to us. Another friend was sharing with me that when she was born, her parents had brought her to the fortune teller who said that she will have 2 因緣 when she's 20+ yrs old and both paths are totally different. True enough, she was presented with this choice and she opted for the new 因緣 . She does think of her ex boyfriend occasionally and does think of what would her life be like if she had decided to stay with him but there's no way she can turn back the clock so she's better off making the best out what she's got now.

Likewise, I was initially reluctant to go to Bangkok when Windie "jio" me as I had unfinished business to settle in Singapore. But eventually I thought a break would be good and asked Mich along. Somehow I decided to ask Marc as well since he was going after Mich then, and who in turn asked Jack to join us. And who would have thought Jack would back out at the last minute leaving DW to take his place! All these happened totally unexpectedly and for a very good reason too - I met the most wonderful man ever & he is now my husband! My 因緣.

Anyway, back to my original topic, I wish this old, dear friend of mine happiness forever and if you ever read this blog, know that you will always be on my mind :)

Why is JD crying?

Frankly, if I knew the answer, I don't think I will still be looking so flustered, trying hard to calm her down. I don't understand these people. They see JD crying and keep asking me why is she crying. Don't they realise that babies can't talk and sometimes it is not that easy to distinguish their cries. This is just Group 1.

Then, group 2 are those people who keep dishing out advice, like baby crying so baby hungry so feed baby now (wtf! I just fed her like half hour ago), or don't go near baby when she's crying, let her cry or else I'll be spoiling her (wtf! try doing that with your own baby, I think you'll run to your baby faster than I did with mine!). Another classic, why your baby has so many spots on her face, you cannot always kiss her (wtf! From what I know it's because baby's skin is still adjusting itself to environment outside the womb so any slight contact with foreign objects like dust may cause baby acne. If it's anything else, I think it's because of your filthy hands touching her which gave her the spots). These are just 3 examples out of many many which I encounter very often.

June (and many other mothers as well), I'm sure you are able to empathize with my frustrations of having to settle a wailing baby and still put up with the nonsensical comments from other people at the same time.

It's not that I do not appreciate advice given to me. I'm grateful that people do care but sometimes they have got to understand that just because they give advice, it doesn't mean the recipients have to adopt them. I may later on if circumstances arise but it need not be now. I will never forget this once when I made 30ml of milk for JD as a top up to her earlier 60ml and this person asked me what rubbish was I doing and forced me to add another 30ml to the earlier 30ml. I didn't want to seem rude so I just quietly did what was asked of me. Well of course JD drank 30ml only and the rest had to be discarded. Need I say more? Would you know JD's appetite and feeding habits better than me?

To mothers to be, always believe in yourself. Listen to what people around you are saying but ultimately, remember that only you know what's best for your child as you are afterall your child's mother.

To my friends, my family and strangers I meet on the streets, thank you for your well meaning advice but if after hearing you out, I give you a nod and a smile please just leave it as that. I have noted your comments and will keep them in mind. Do not insist I implement your advice immediately in front of you to show that I have understood. I have.

Robinsons

I never could understand what was so hip about Robinsons. The clothes there were boring (and probably still are, with the exception of Coast) and I had always thought it was only a place where aunties congregate. How could it have survived for so long! Why was Robinsons' sale THE Sale worth waiting for? At this point, I was still hanging out at Zouk or MOS every Friday & Saturday.

As I was preparing for my wedding, my shopping list began to change slightly. Yes, there were still clothes & shoes on the list but bedsheets, quilts & pillows were slowly added. This was when I started to get excited about each Robinsons' sale. That would mean I could buy even more pillows, better quality bedlinens at a much lower price. It didn't help that Winsland House was only a stone's throw away. Every lunch time will be spent just walking round & round the household department. It was ok that I came out empty handed, as long as I had my kick of checking out the bedlinens and seeing which one had more threadcounts. Btw, I love Hush Puppies Royal, lovely to sleep on.

Now that I have a kid, it's getting even more exciting! Extra discount for card members means more savings for me. A mailer from Robinsons usually includes a voucher to offset against my total purchase. Doesn't matter that I'm no longer working at Winsland House. DW now is. *grins*. So I send him there ever so often to buy things on my behalf, or should I say, JD's behalf. The shopping list has now evolved to include toys, baby bottles, baby clothes. Yes, the 6th floor is our new found shopping haven.

I finally understand what's the big deal about a Robinsons' sale. I've graduated to Aunty status.

Cyclists

I loathe the cyclists I meet on the roads every morning. From Paya lebar, to Guillemard, along the Nicoll Highway up to Raffles Place.

Some obviously think that they are still in their homeland. Some behave as though they are from _ _ _ _ _. Their bikes are old & rickety. They ride on the roads, against the traffic. They ride all over the place from the left lane to the right lane. They don't have the common sense to know that riding at the side of the lane doesn't help either as cars are too big to squeeze through 3/4 of the remaining lane and will still need to cut out to the next lane. They don't pay road tax. They don't pay traffic fines. They don't pay ERP. They get the choice of cycling on pavements and roads. They get to choose to either endanger lives of pedestrians or ruin the future of drivers. They are able to utilize the green, red man or the greed, red, amber lights, whichever turns 1st in their favour. They get away with everything that we drivers don't. They have the privilege of ringing their bells incessantly at us pedestrians & glare at us as though we are taking up their space.

More patrolling should be done around these areas. Laws should be enforced to ensure that these people are educated, albeit the painful way. Fine them, throw them in jail. Do whatever, just take the menace off the roads.

I loathe them.

Smashed mug

JD kicked my favourite Garfield mug this morning and it smashed into pieces. Instead of looking apologetic, she started crying very loudly as though it was our fault that the sudden "piang" startled her. Tsk. Badly behaved. I was so sad when I saw the smashed cup on the floor and immediately wanted to rant at DW & JD but I controlled, breathed in and out 10 times and I walked away to get a broom.

But within myself I know that no other will ever take the place of my Garfield cup. It can't even be found anymore. And even if I had a new one, the exact same one, it still just wouldn't be the same.

:(